I have a lot to say. I just don’t know where to start… My youngest sister, who was kidnapped as an infant, found me after 18 years. She had a lot of questions and I had to rip open a lot of parts of me that I sewed up. Still processing. Surgery on my ear […]
I have a lot to say. Just not tonight. Surgery in the morning. Wish me luck.
When I strip all of the busy out of my life, I am still just left with me. Pretending everything is ok. When it’s not. It’s not ok at all. I am not ok at all.
Before I lay down to try and sleep, I wanted to report on my lunch today with Ri-, our Dungeon Master for D&D. Well, what can I say? I learned so much about a new person and a little something new about myself. First, me. I can’t explain what it is, but certain people attract […]
I have found it cathartic…to a small extent…to write emails to Bi- (even though yes, I know I am blocked and he won’t receive them). But in my head, that email address is still /his/ and it’s something he made, and so writing to it makes me /feel/ as though I have some connection to […]
What am I waiting for? Somewhere along the way, I convinced myself that if I continue to hold true to my promises and goals, that it would show that I really do love and I really do care. But I am only fooling myself. I am holding on to a ghost. Someone who is long […]
Sigh.
A while back, I sat down, pen in hand, to try and write a rap for the first time in my life. I thought it came out prreeeetttttyyy sick. How do I sell this to a rapper? I need money – I am a grad student after all. 🙂 Exigency of this epiphany Volatility to […]
Dear mom, Hi. I uh… So, uh, well, I don’t know if you know this or not, but you died. In my arms. It was sort of…my fault. I guess. I mean, I killed you. I…I think maybe I was angry at you. Or angry at the world. I don’t know. I thought I was […]
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