I wanted to treat you all to a ballerina’s view of leg day. That’s a joke because every dance session is leg day. By the end, your calves are cramping and your ankles ache. I uh, I did ok today. It was hard to get out of bed this morning, but I did it. I spent the day in the library focusing. After ballet, when I was walking along the lagoon to my home, I had to just stop and take a few deep breaths. The moon was reflecting in the water and lights were twinkling as well. The air is cold and crisp and there was a wind blowing the loose hairs from my ponytail around my face. I thought, “wow, this is a beautiful night, it would be nice to sit near a bonfire.” I started o tear up and cry, but I didn’t allow myself. Someone recently told me, “losing someone special to you means that you’re grieving over two people – the person you loved and the person who you thought you would’ve been with them.” It’s true. It’s the future you had planned that really dies. It’s the person you wanted to be for them and the person that wanted to make memories with them that dies. Not much a person, more of an idea that never got a chance. I stood there staring at the ripples in the lagoon, I miss him. But in a way, this was a good thing. I remembered humility and I was reminded about the important of kindness to others. It’s an important lesson and I won’t make the same mistakes again. I’m very lucky to have the ability of self-reflection for my actions and I’m also very lucky to have a strong support group that lifts me through my darkest times.