I’m hiding out in the dance room of the gym crying my heart out. I just needed someone to talk to. I can’t even work out without crying…I’m so exhausted. How am I going to get through this? I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t feel normal inside. I hate this, I hate the space. I feel so lost. I start to go numb and then it all comes back, playing every scene of that weekend in my head over and over, trying to analyze everything. Then the grief cycle starts over. I am so…so exhausted. There’s only one thing that plays constantly and it’s this: I just want you to care that I am hurting. I don’t understand why you’re doing this to me. I don’t understand.